This morning I was sleepin' away in my warm bed. Snuggled down in the covers, wearin' a new pair of flannel jammies.
All of a sudden there is a terrible racket in my kitchen. I roll over and put my head under the covers. Damn. I can still hear it. So I roll back over and say "Hey - cut a girl a break - it's only 5:00!!"
Then it dawns on me. I live alone. There should be no racket in my kitchen!!
WTF?!?!?!?!
So I jump up - gain my balance and creep into the kitchen. As I hit the light I see one of the cookies the landlady brought me sitting on the stove. I didn't put that there. Then I see a little brown/tan mouse stick his head out from behind the control panel. He sees me. I see him. Then he's gone.
But....there he is again. He is looking at me. Then looking at the cookie. Then looking at me. He really wants that cookie. I think he's gonna risk it.
That bastard was on top of my microwave, pulled a cookie out of the covered (with plastic wrap) bowl and drug that damned cookie across my stove. That was the noise I heard. So I grabbed the bowl of cookies and threw them away. (Sorry Helen, but they've been touched by a mouse - I won't be eating any.) Then, with that flippin' mouse still peeking out from the control panel of my stove I grabbed the cookie. Stealth like - the Pink Ninja would have been proud. As I turn back around the mouse is still there. Looking at me. I swear I saw a glint in it's beady little eyes. I think I pissed it off.
Damn - those mouses followed me. And now they got attitude.
Posted by Tammi at December 21, 2005 06:09 AMI'm new to reading your blog and you're probably going to ban me for this...just hope that mouse's name isn't Socrates. I couldn't resist, you know.
Posted by: Tina at December 21, 2005 09:53 AMI know you won't like this, but I advise getting the extremely inhumane sticky pads. Decon will just leave you with dead mouse smell, ( and I bet Contagion had thought of that, he's so evil) and spring traps don't work so well. That mouse is the enemy! You must use deadly force! It may just be cookies now but it won't end there and you know it!
Yeah, about 2 pots of coffee so far, why do you ask?
Posted by: Raging Mom at December 21, 2005 10:50 AMPink ninja would sooooo have fight club with that sneaky little *#@%...
and she would win
Posted by: armywifetoddlermom at December 21, 2005 11:03 AM3 Rules of Mouse War Fare
Chemical Weapons are allowed and in fact are even encouraged (I use DeCon like it's going out of style. Curse of living in the boondocks: Field Mice.)
Glue is not just for show and tell anymore. (Glue traps rock. No pulling crunched dead mice out of metal snap contraptions. Just pick up the whole thing and chuck it.)
Target practice is great (Get a BB Pistol. Invite the family. Sit up late around a bowl of cheese and pick off the little bastards one at a time as they sneak to the plate. Great fun for the whole family! Better than reality TV!)
Posted by: BloodSpite at December 21, 2005 11:04 AMBefore Clone was born, I used decon all the time. Never had a problem with dead mouse smell. The way the stuff works, the dead suckers don't smell... unless they die in a heating vent.
Posted by: Contagion at December 21, 2005 08:08 PMLOL! OH I am soooo sorry, but this was a really really funny post.
Posted by: Bou at December 21, 2005 10:20 PM