June 28, 2005


Life has a way of throwing us curves. We all know that - but damn, it's not always pleasant.

I was thinking about that last night as I was trying to sleep. The secret to happiness - so I'm told - is learning to deal with those curves.

We all have our own ways. Some people withdrawl. Pull into themselves and ponder lifes follies. Some people run. They get very social. Oh they are still withdrawling, they're just withdrawling from themselves. Me - I do kind of a combination of the two. I stay to myself - only talking to those closest to me. And I bury myself in activity. Mind exercises as it were. I read. I write. I just try to do anything that will make me focus so I can't think about "stuff".

I'm not gonna kid anyone. I'm still trying to adjust to this new life style. I miss Florida. I really do. I know life wasn't easy there - hell my job was kickin' my ass and kept me to busy to enjoy things. BUT...in this warped, oh poor me mind of mine I miss the OPPORTUNITY to do those things I love. But that is so superficial. What I miss most is the fact that my life was simply that. MY LIFE. I had flexible work hours - most of the time. If I wanted to go, do something I did. No second thoughts about it. Done. My money was my own. I had no responsibility to anyone else. Just me. Well, and Cody - but still - you know what I mean.

I miss those carefree days. I miss going to the coast. I miss my friends. Oh, I'm loving getting the chance to spend time with folks up here - please don't take that any other way. But I miss 'em. They played a big part in my life and sometimes I just need a hug, a laugh or a damned margarita. Sitting outside, in the Gulf breeze, in my bathing suit and big denim shirt.

But I digress........what I lament right now is the loss of my freedom. I knew it was going to be, oh, let's say "interesting". But Damn....sometimes it just gets a bit overwhelming.

It'll be fine. I know that. And I'm fully aware by being so cryptic this all sounds so petty. But...there you have it. Sometimes we're all a bit petty and it's my turn. Na

So I'm off to another day in the office. Juggling timelines and bills. Hoping to just survive the next 2 weeks. Oh, hell - let's just take it a day at a time.

Meanwhile - I'll be the chick with a book sittin' at the end of the bar.

Posted by Tammi at June 28, 2005 07:09 AM

I think you are very strong for doing what you are doing. And you know that through every hard thing you go through, you come out stronger and more wise!

You are right, take it one day at a time. Even sometimes one hour at a time! And you know if you need anything, ANYTHING at all, I'm here and so is everyone else!

And some of the best advice I ever got, and I'm still struggling to abide by it, "You can do anything for a year!"

Posted by: Sissy at June 28, 2005 07:50 AM

Hang in there. We've got your back.

Posted by: Koolaid at June 28, 2005 09:12 AM

*leaving the smell of the sea, and a marguerita*

Posted by: ArmyWifeToddlerMom at June 28, 2005 09:44 AM


Posted by: Harvey at June 28, 2005 10:32 AM

I am a firm believer in fate, that everything happens for a reason. While we may not know for a while what that reason is, there is always a reason.

And that reason usually turns out to be a good thing. So just keep hanging in there, your fate is coming.

Posted by: Machelle at June 28, 2005 10:52 AM

I was actually a little homesick for OKLHAOMA today.


I think what 'homesick' means is that we're missing things that are familiar.

Be good to yourself, please, and take things one day at a time -- and, of course, what Koolaid said. :)


Posted by: Margi at June 28, 2005 01:12 PM

Erm....Oklahoma. Sheesh.

Posted by: Margi at June 28, 2005 01:21 PM

Sorry I haven't written/poosted in a month of Sundays Tammi.

You hang in there girl, the secret to life is NOT dealing with curves.

It's ignoring them ;)

It's good coffee, good friends, good books, good dogs, children and watermelon wine as Tom T Hall said.

Emphasis what you do enjoy, what you can do where you are. Problems are still going to be there tommorow. Still going to be there the next day; but friends! Their time is often shorter on this earth than we realise. Keep'em close!

I'll try to do better in E-mailing ya
Meanwhile I have to go back to sleep before I go in to work tonight! Take care!

Posted by: BloodSPite at June 28, 2005 02:43 PM