I know you are all probably saying to yourself - "who the hell does she think she is" when I give relationship advice. I'm not in a relationship, haven't been in a decent one in a long while, and let's face it - my marriage was a text book example of "HELL". But....that doesn't mean I don't know a thing or two.
TNT tells us how happy she was when her Beloved Husband, aka Harvey, showed up to watch her play in a local racquetball tournament. I, of course, put in my .02 worth in the comments, but wanted to kind of exand on it here.
Back in my married days, my husband and the boys were fairly active in "events". All three of my boys were big bowlers. In fact the oldest one almost went pro. He was that good. I never missed a week. I never missed a tournament. I worked full time, kept house and still was there every week. It showed them they mattered and that I cared about what they did.
My husband was always doing something (in more ways than one). He was on a softball league. He was one of the best pitchers in his age bracket for slow pitch in the state. I never missed a game. (have I ever mentioned how much I HATE baseball!). He also bowled. Every Tuesday night. I would bring my work, or a book or what ever and, yes I was there every week. He shot pool. I don't. But I was there. I did miss a couple of tournaments because they conflicted with the boys - but he understood. He shot darts. I learned how, enjoyed it and we played on a league. I was there when he shot the $1,000 dart. And won. (damn, wonder where that money went?!?)
But the point was I was there. I supported his activities. If he didn't want me there - I'd have given him his space. I did have better things to do - things I enjoyed. But....I learned by watching my parents that it's important that your "significant other" know that you support them.
So.....I've sat in freezing cold hockey rinks watching someone I care about get the crap beat out of him on the ice, I've sat on a boat for hours watching a fishing tournament. But I really can say I don't regret a minute of it. It was a simple way of saying I Love You. You matter to me. I want you to be happy.
Thus ends the Tammi's Tips on Relationships - for today. ;-)
Posted by Tammi at March 14, 2005 08:44 AMAND, you are absolutely correct!!
I don't know what happened to the marriage, but I can guess it had less to do with your love and devotion...
; )
Posted by: Christina at March 14, 2005 10:03 AMExactly right, but we rarely do any activities apart.
Hubby gets into a lot of bowling tournaments and I've been at every single one of them. It's almost torture watching someone bowl and not bowling yourself.
I couldn't imagine not supporting a loved one when they are doing something they love to do.
Posted by: Machelle at March 14, 2005 10:06 AMI buy the wife candy and diamonds. That usually makes her happy. However, we do about 90% of our activities together, including work. The other 10% we do for our own alone time.
Posted by: contagion at March 15, 2005 08:22 AMWell said, but that love should go both ways too, and like TNT said, it hurts just a little when it doesn't. Better half and I do most of our activities together but have been married long enough to know that we want or need to do some things alone, but that it is still special to do them together :)
Posted by: oddybobo at March 15, 2005 01:40 PM