March 07, 2005

Reminds me of a story

Dash has a post talking about how so many companies are using GPS systems now a days. The companies say it is to keep track of their equipment and to assist employees as well as make sure they are doin' what they should be doin'.
Reminds me of a story!

Long Long Time Ago - back in my early steel days - I WAS the GPS system.

I worked in a steel coating facility. We shipped the nicely coated, cut and inspected steel coils to processors to then go on to appliance and automotive companies. If you got in a bind and shut down a plant because you didn't get the steel where it needed to go in time - well, let's just say it costs lots and lots of money! Yeah - not a good conversation to have with your boss.

So...I had a hot load that needed to get to a processor in Southern Michigan to be slit and than up to an automotive account that needed it YESTERDAY. HOT HOT HOT!!

Since I used to work in the shipping office I knew all the drivers pretty well. I knew who I could trust and who would get the job done....so I thought.

I picked Duane to run this load. It was a 45 min. drive and Duane lived up that way so it was almost on his way home. He arrived and while they loaded the truck I explained to him how important this was and that he had 1 hour to get the load delivered. That gave him a 15 min. buffer and believe me - with traffic that wasn't much of a buffer at all!

I went up to my office after our discussion and he took off. I forgot to mention that I was following the load so that we knew exactly when it was delivered to the automotive plant for processing. It was THAT hot.

Anyway - he gets about a 5 min. headstart on me. The plant is located out in the middle of a bunch of corn fields. Nothing around for miles - just farms and woods and cornfields. EXCEPT for the truckstop/whorehouse at the main intersection.

As I approach that infamous intersection I see Duane's truck. WTF?!?! Man....that SOB better be using the bathroom!

I tear into the parking lot - slam on my breaks and get out of the car. SLAM the car door and charge into the truckstop (the whorehouse was upstairs and YES it had a red light!). All in my designer suit and 3" pumps.

ME: Joe? Where's Duane?
JOE: Uhhh, well, ummmm..
ME: Is that son of a bitch upstairs?
Joe:
ME: Gol Darn it (ok - it's close to what I said).

I pull out my cell phone and call dispatch.

ME: This is Tammi at */*. I need a new tracter and driver at THE truckstop at X & Y NOW! He's got to be close - Hey? Is Roger available? Yeah - send him and tell him we have to switch the trailer off of Duane's tractor to his.

ME: Oh - and I don't ever want Duane to TOUCH a COIL of MY Steel AGAIN! Is that clear? ( I could do that - the plant owned this particular carrier)

Dispatch: Crystal

OK - now I'm really pissed. It's gonna take more time than I have to get the trailer switched over. I call the processor and make up some great story and buy myself some time. Oh - I had to pay the overtime charges for the crew that stayed over waiting to slit this coil - but it's STILL less than what the automotive plant would charge if I'm late.

THEN....I head up stairs. Oh yeah - you knew I was gonna do it, didn't ya?!

Standing on the landing:

ME: DUANE? DUANE! You son of a bitch - get your pants on and get your ass out here!

Duane: Tammi? WTF are you doin? I'm busy here!

ME: Yeah - well, you're gonna have plenty of time for that in the next few months - you ain't driving my shit anymore. Get your pants on and bring me the flippin' keys to your tractor! We gotta switch trailers.

Well......as it turns out, we got the trailers switched, coils slit and steel delivered just in time. Duane never drove any deliveries for me again - AND was completely unable to ever look me in the eye again.

Neither rain, nor ice nor piece of ass could stop MY steel from being delivered!

Posted by Tammi at March 7, 2005 09:28 PM | TrackBack
Comments

That's a funny story. Sounds like ol'Duane wasn't too swift in more ways than one.

Posted by: Dash at March 7, 2005 10:21 PM

Uhh, "Hot Load", eh? heh.

Posted by: _Jon at March 7, 2005 11:25 PM

OMG!!! He couldn't have just dropped the load off first and then gone back??? What a moron! And good for you for going after him - I'd have loved to have been there. *grin*

Posted by: Teresa at March 8, 2005 12:41 AM

That is freaking hilarious! I love it!

Posted by: Sissy at March 8, 2005 01:32 AM

That's hilarious. I'm sure it wasn't at the time, but it is now.

Posted by: Contagion at March 8, 2005 08:19 AM

Note to self: do NOT piss off Tammi :-)

Posted by: Harvey at March 8, 2005 11:55 AM

I gotta frickin' remember to link this tonight... too classic not to.

Posted by: Bou at March 8, 2005 03:51 PM

You are wonderful. Way too funny!

Posted by: vw bug at March 9, 2005 06:40 AM

This is great! I wish I coulda been a fly on that wall!

Posted by: Oddybobo at March 11, 2005 08:38 AM