Tammi's World

It Makes No Sense

This is one of those "Icky Girlie TMI" posts so I'll put the bulk in the extended entry. I know not everyone is a fan of those. It's just some days.....

Ok. Back in my late 20's I had some "female issues". Actually I'd had them all my life, and just got fed up about that time. I pretty much forced them to give me a hysterectomy.

They fought me tooth and nail. I had only had 1 miscarriage, I was only 27 - still many childbearing years left. Plus, it's never really been the "treatment of choice" for what I was dealing with.

I didn't care. I had enough with the pain and issues and wasn't going to take anymore!!

So they agreed to a simple hysterectomy. Again, I put my foot down. I wanted a radical. Take it all. Everything. It was my experience that in those situations, if they didn't take it all, they'd have to go back later and finish the job. This was a one shot deal. I had 3 kids to worry about, a job and a house to run. I didn't have time to dilly dally.

Well, it turns out the surgery actually saved my life. There was a lot more wrong than they thought. My doctor actually apologized for fighting me on it.

Yeah. Yippee. Whatever.

Anyway.....I refused to take hormones. Oh, I took them during my three day stay in the hospital. You NEVER fight them there, at least then, or you'd never get out. But when I got home I threw the rest of the meds and the prescription away. No way in HELL I was putting THAT crap in my system.

So, I make sure I get plenty of calcium and do everything I can to fight off osteoporosis. And having that surgery was the smartest thing I've ever done. I'm healthier than you can imagine. My immune system ROCKS.

I've even had a friend say that NOW, I'm the perfect woman. No PMS, I'm just consistently bitchy. You know what to expect.

But lately, I'm finding that's not so true. I'm about as emotional as I've ever been. In fact, it's almost bi-polar.

For instance, this morning....I was reading a very funny story. Laughing my ass off. When all of a sudden I realize, Hey! I'm not laughing!! I'm crying!! WTF?!?!?!?

It's just bizarre to me. I'm not one of those "emotional roller coaster" kinda gals. Really. I'm pretty steady. Oh, I have my moments, but they pass very quickly.

But this? This is making me crazy!!! I know it's not "the change". Hell, I dealt with that 15+ years ago. This? This is all new.

I don't know what it is, but I'll tell you one thing. This shit better stop and stop quickly. I HATE this in other people. I don't think I can deal with it personally.

Posted by Tammi at August 12, 2007 06:02 AM | TrackBack