June 24, 2007

I thought they loved me....

Well, I *THOUGHT* my family loved me. At least they *SAID* they did.

You wouldn't believe what I've been through the past couple of evenings.

We got to Carmen's Friday evening, and ohhhhhh wait til you see the pictures I have of that sweet baby! Seriously, I should have brought him home with me. His Mama and Grandma are EVIL and do not deserve such sweetness!!

Anyway - the evening started out with my sweet(?) niece Carmen offering me a chair out on their patio to smoke. The chair was sittin' on a fire ant hill. Yeah, I"m sorta kinda really allergic to those sons o bitches. THEN I'm getting dive bombed by bees and wasps. Also seriously allergic to those. I'm thinkin' she smeared honey on the side of the chair to attract them.

She's evil that way.

We go back in the house and I'm attacked by her Pittbull Terrier. Attacked I tell you. It wasn't pretty.

As I sit down to relax and recover from my near death experiences, she FORCES me to hold Patrick. "You MUST hold him. He NEEDS to know you."

Bossy bill-o-goods that girl.

The next day they send ME off to pick up lunch. Now folks, they live in the COUNTRY. Serious country. I drive off with the instructions "It's by the interstate" and an empty tank of gas. And yes - I did have to call once for directions. I heard the laughter in the background. I'm thinkin' it was some kind of a test. Either way - it was a pretty mean thing to do to your loving Aunt Tammi.

The drive back and forth to Cuz's house was accomplished at warp speed. Seriously - I didn't know that old Toyota could peg out like that for that length of time. Holy Shit!!

We ordered pizza for dinner and Cuz tried to force feed me a hot pepper - knowing it would surely kill me. But don't worry. I was actually paying attention and stopped that one in it's tracks.

Chris, my nephew, his lovely lady and Christopher were waiting for us when we get back. A wonderful evening spent with them.

There are other instances I just can't remember. I think I'm blocking the memory to save my sanity.

Now - I have to finish packing and it's off to the airport. I'll be home by noon.

But seriously - I'm thinkin' my family is tryin' to knock me off so they can get my barrell chairs all that much earlier. I don't remember the last time I was so abused.

And I just can't stop smiling.

Posted by Tammi at June 24, 2007 06:33 AM | TrackBack
Comments

And by "attacked", you mean "sniffed and licked to death"?

Posted by: sarahk at June 25, 2007 12:50 PM
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