March 31, 2007

Funniest Thing EVER

Seriously, when I read this post over at Chrystal's site last night I had tears running down my face by the time I was finished.

Holy Shit.

She. Is. My. Hero.

Hurry up - get yourself a fresh drink and get thee over there and read. Then hurry back, cause it triggered a little memory of my own.



Now, I've mentioned that I had three step sons. They were pretty good boys - well, the middle one gave me some trouble. Ok, a lot of trouble. But there's one in every crowd.

Anyway - the year he turned 15 was not a good year for him. He LIVED on my shit list. And - I do not reward bad behavior so Christmas that year was a bit of a challenge.

About 2 weeks before the big day, he REALLY screwed up. I mean pulled one of those "I'm just like my Daddy" deals, and believe me - that was not a good thing.

So, I took back all his presents. Every last one of them. Then I went to Walgreens. And proceeded to purchase every condom in the store. Then hit Osco's and did the same thing.

Yes, all my son got for Christmas that year was condoms. I figured if he was gonna "screw up" he was gonna do it right. (I know - it was Mommy humor, give me a break). You should have seen his face.

Needless to say - he was not a happy camper. I told him it could have just as easily been coal, but I wasn't in the mood to clean up that kind of mess.

When the kids were going home, I made sure and bagged up all of his "gifts" so he could carry them with him easily.

Point made.

Until Memorial Day weekend. That would be the weekend he told his father and I his girlfriend was pregnant and we were going to be grandparents.

I was 27.

My reaction? (well, after the tears were done)

Do you mean to tell me you used all those damned condoms ALREADY?!?!?!?!

Damn.......guess I didn't get the last laugh on that one at all. NOW do you see why Chrystal's my hero?!?!?!

Posted by Tammi at March 31, 2007 05:28 AM | TrackBack


Posted by: Laughing Wolf at March 31, 2007 07:12 AM

HOLY CRAP! I should have checked your blog before I posted mine. I, too, linked to this post! TOO funny!

Posted by: Lemon Stand at April 1, 2007 05:45 PM
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