Tammi's World

Another 48 Hours

Today. Today is THE day.

Today I meet with the owner/CEO of the company. One shot. That's all I got.

Funny thing is, I'm not really nervous. It's beyond that at this point.

Yesterday I was working in the office again. Sorting through papers and such. Found the folder with all my award write ups from Tropicana. I'm taking those along, as most of my recognition there was earned because of my management of the brokers. That's what this job is all about, so I figure I'll take some extra ammunition...just in case.

This has all really come together quickly. The best part is we will know within the next 24 to 48 hours what is happening. I'll have answers. THAT is all I'm wanting right now. Answers.

Talking with Cuz last night I did start to panic. I've been internalizing as much of the stress as possible. I don't have time for a melt down, so I just alternate between being frozen in fear and manic. Yeah, I'm GREAT company right now.

Here's the thing.......No matter what happens I have to move out of The Little Blue Cracker House. Have to. Can't stay here - it's sold. I also have run out of money. None. Nada. Broke.

Cuz is flying up here on Thursday. Originally the thought was, she comes up here, helps me pack, we load a truck with my stuff, put Maggie May (my car) on a dolly and head to Florida. Put everything in storage and I live with them until I get a job and get back on my feet.

Now, if I get this job, I have to put everything in storage and find 1) a place to crash for a month (until I get money together) 2) a new place to live.

That is all happening this weekend. She is FLYING IN ON THURSDAY. We don't know if we should rent a local or one way truck. We don't know if we should get a storage unit here or there. Does she purchase a one way ticket or round trip?

This is really putting her out. And I have no answers for her. None. I'm just standing here.

So - I cannot begin to tell you the relief of knowing that we will have answers within the next 48 hours.

I knew I was starting to go into overload last night. I also knew I needed to sleep. Badly. So - I took a pill. And drank some herbal tea. I slept like the dead. 8 hours. Straight through. Sweet Goodness that was nice. No panic attacks. No tossing and turning. Just sleep. Peaceful, deep sleep.

48 hours. I'll know where to focus in 48 hours.

Posted by Tammi at May 23, 2006 07:02 AM | TrackBack