February 16, 2006

Maybe THIS Is Why

Some of us were telling stories yesterday at work, to break the tension. There's one engineer there that I just enjoy the hell out of. Cool, cool dude. Anyway........

Somehow we got on the topics of bachelor and bachelorette parties. Now, I have to be honest, I've really only been to one bachelorette party. In telling the story I think I know why. Let me share......

There was a club in Tampa called Stingers. It's long gone, but in it's day, it was THE place to go. And I did. Often. Get all decked out, dancin' and drinkin'. Three of my favorite things.

A friend of mine was getting married so her best friend plans the bachelorette party for a night at Stingers that the "Sunshine Calendar Men" are performing.

Now, I have to be honest. That shit does nothing for me. Crowd of people, all put on. Too fakey. Not my cup of tea.

We girls were in the back of the club, sittin' and standin' around one of the satellite bars. The guys were up on stage in the front of the club. We couldn't have seen a thing if we wanted too. So I guess someone told them what we were there for because at one point a couple of them danced their way back to us.

Now, these guys did have pretty incredible bodies. All toned and tanned. But, like I said - that atmosphere does nothing for me. Oh, and I'd been drinkin' a bit. ;-)

So I'm sitting on a bar stool in my cute little black spandex skirt and little top. I'm chair dancing and having a conversation with one of my friends. This dude dances up to me. I'm ignoring him. I guess he didn't like that. He spread my legs apart and started trying to dance in between them.


Oh, and I might want to mention this guy was maybe, MAYBE 5'6". As he's trying to do what ever it is he's trying to do I finally stop my conversation and look at him. "Well well well. Aren't we a little man?!"

I meant height wise, honest I did.

He left.

My friends start crackin' up. I hear one of the yell over the music - "That, Tammi, is why you are not dating."

Maybe it's also why I haven't been invited to anymore bachelorette parties.

Posted by Tammi at February 16, 2006 07:05 AM


My best friend was to be best man [yes, she's a woman] to her friend from college, so I went to a bachelor party at a strip club with them all... in Omaha, Nebraska.

We bought the groom-to-be a lap dance and were having a great time, though it was a little weird for the other guys there... they didn't know if they could really unwind because we'd rat on them to their wives and girlfriends... Heh... Which we would never have done, by the way.

Anyway, we go to the bathroom and some of the strippers in there asked if we were 'dancing tonight'... We were dumbfounded, to say the least. Turns out it was amateur night, but no, we didn't try it, no matter how much we drank... ;)

Good memories, like the 'little man'. :D

Posted by: pam at February 16, 2006 08:21 AM

I would have loved to see his face. Priceless I am sure!

Posted by: oddybobo at February 16, 2006 08:28 AM

Having been a bouncer, I have been subjected to the bachelorette party many a time. For some reason, (and I find this to be true of much younger folks) they think that they have an open pass to do whatever to whomever they want. My friends (also bouncers) and I decided one night that we would try to segregate the party from the bachelor party that was going on at the same time. I still have nightmares about it--

Posted by: Gray Hogan at February 16, 2006 09:11 AM

Yet another case of a woman destroying a man just forher own amusement. I bet he was never the same again.

Posted by: Contagion at February 16, 2006 10:57 AM

tee hee hee

Posted by: Carmen at February 16, 2006 11:47 AM

... I'm with Contagion... that was mean...

Posted by: Eric at February 16, 2006 03:18 PM

Contagion... Eric... one thing... he TOUCHED her! He's lucky to have anything left to dance with.

Posted by: Teresa at February 16, 2006 06:14 PM

Yuck. That whole situation doesn't do anything for me either. Ick.

Posted by: Bou at February 16, 2006 10:29 PM

Damn you're good ;)

Posted by: Sgt Hook at February 18, 2006 10:59 AM

I was kicked out of a strip club once because a buddy of mine offered a stripper $5 to put her clothes back on....

Posted by: Graumagus at February 18, 2006 12:56 PM