June 18, 2005

A Different View of Father's Day

I hesitate to write this. I don't want to take anything away from Fatherhood. It's one of the most awsome responsibilities in life. And a good Father is a gift. Being a Father is an even bigger gift.

But in life things happen. Circumstances being what they are - sometimes we lose that gift, or never really have the opportunity.

Daddy died in '72. But I was lucky. I had men in my life that stepped up. That made the effort to be a part of my life - to try and fill that void. It didn't work completely - but it did help.

Uncle Bobby Fishook was Daddy's best friend. Up until the day he died I thought that was his name....the man lived to fish. He was a gentle man, kind, protective. Many a Saturday he would come to the house and pick me up. We'd go riding around and he'd tell me stories of he and Daddy's adventures. He didn't want me to forget. He wanted me to know my father. We lost him when I was 16. I still miss him. But in my minds eye I see he and my father sitting on the bank of the river, fishing and telling stories. It makes me smile and lessens the pain.

My God-father is cut from a different cloth. He's a business man first and foremost. But he's also a disiplinarian. He is the one that kept the reins tight during my teenage years. He is the one that pushed me to be more than I thought I could be. He still does. But he loves me. That is obvious. He takes his role very seriously. He was a great admirer of my father. And he doesn't want to fail in his promise to support, love and guide me.

Then there are my many uncles. Each and every one of them has had a part in making me who I am today. Some taught me to laugh, taught me to flirt (which I failed miserably at). They taught me to pray and trust.

All of these men have helped to make me Tammi. And I love them all. Without them my life would be less. I can't even begin to imagine it.

I don't have any children. I doubt I'll have that joy. BUT....I take my responsibilities to those children in my life very seriously. I hug, console, tease and teach. I treat and chide and offer a helping hand when I can. It's all I can do. It's the least I can do. I learned that from the men in my life.

So....even if you don't have any children of your own, realize the impact you have on those around you. Look at the children in your circle. Love them. Treasure them. Teach them. Understand that they need you. Even if both parents are there - they need you. Children can never have too many people that love them.

And thank you. Thank you from a little girl who felt so very lost. Thank you for caring enough to make the effort.

It matters. It's important.

Happy Father's Day.

Posted by Tammi at June 18, 2005 07:28 AM

What a wonderful post. You can babysit for me ANYTIME. No really...

Posted by: Koolaid at June 18, 2005 11:25 AM

This was a really great post Tammi --sign me up for the babysitting too! haha (really I like you too much to do that to you! )

Posted by: ALa at June 18, 2005 12:13 PM

That was beautiful, Tammi. Thank you.

Posted by: Sally at June 18, 2005 01:11 PM

You are so right. Even with two parents, or four...it was the people around me that helped even more!! Don't ever doubt what kind of impact you have on a child! You could be making their great life even better and adding to their experiences...or you could mean the world to a child and you not even know it!

I'm glad you appreciate all the men that have helped mold you over the years.

Posted by: Sissy at June 18, 2005 06:35 PM

Yes, we are twins.... same thought, sentiments and theme in today's post! How uncanny is that!

Posted by: michele at June 18, 2005 09:21 PM

That was very touching, Tammi. Let me tell you -- one of my most favorite-est people in the whole wide world is my auntie. She could never have kids. And I always always thought she deserved them more than anyone -- because she was a huge part of my life and still is today.

That's why I wish her Happy Mother's Day along with my Mom. (They are known, collectively, as The Mommies™.)

Just so you know.

And I second that babysittin' thing. :o)

{{ hugs }}

Posted by: Margi at June 18, 2005 11:53 PM