June 07, 2005

It's just futile

So I had this hankerin’ for tacos at lunch today (damn you Joe!). There’s this little place downtown that does a pretty good job so I called and ordered some take out.

I’m drivin’ along, listening to a new-to-me radio station when I realized they were talking about ME. Well, not me, but hey – I fall into that category!

Let me see if I can explain……..

The guys were sayin’ that there is NOTHING that a woman can say, how ever innocent, that cannot be made into a sexual comment.

For example:

She said: I like to work out

He said: I’ll give you a good work out.

OK – that one was easy

She said: I like to write letters

He said: do you like a soft lead or a hard lead.

That was when I realized I’m just gonna have to give up the fight. Throw in the towel. Either that or just stop talking. (Like THAT will ever happen!) You see – many of you may not realize it, but I have a gift. Or a curse, depending on how you look at it. I say the worst things in the most innocent manner. I don’t mean them the way they come out – honest I don’t. If I do…you know it by the glint in my eye and the smirk on my face. But in normal conversation – it don’t matter. Something will come out wrong. I guarantee it.

So…..I might as well surrender now. I’ll never win this one. Even if I DO get a good filter installed in my brain, things will still come out wrong.

Oh Well…….at least it’s always good for a laugh.

Posted by Tammi at June 7, 2005 09:37 PM

Oh, I'll give you something to laugh about...

Wait a minute.

I'm not sure that worked quite right...

Posted by: Ogre at June 8, 2005 04:58 AM

"Something will come out wrong. I guarantee it."

Which is why I love you so :-)

Posted by: Harvey at June 8, 2005 06:48 AM

Comedian Rick Scheidner had a joke like that many years ago: "Men can make a dirty joke out of ANYTHING. A girl says, 'I need to get my tires rotated', men will say, 'Yeah, I'D like to rotate her tires!"

What can I say. We're scum.

Posted by: brykMantra at June 8, 2005 07:00 AM

It's from being near the BE family. Hey, I'm the one that was purely innocent in talking about damp sheets.

Posted by: Bou at June 8, 2005 08:59 PM

Yeah Bou, Totally innocent. That's you! (I'll never forgive you for that (excellent) one-liner you got off on me at the Reunion.)

Tammi, Harvey bet me to it. Instead of the pitcher throwing all kinds of curve balls and change ups, when you serve them up, they all come straight down the pipe. All we gotta do is crank them out of the park. That's why we love you. (That, and we know that the comment is so totally innocent, but just too juicy to pass up.)

Posted by: Johnny - Oh at June 8, 2005 09:28 PM

Uhhh, yeah.
I have a tendancy to do that.

Posted by: _Jon at June 9, 2005 12:51 PM